We are never actors on stage

Life is not like in the movies, although we often heard the sayings ‘we all are actors on stage’, I don’t think so. We say, ‘looks doesn’t matter’, I don’t think so. We say, ‘love is beautiful’, no, I don’t think so. We say that because we want it to, but in reality, those are all lies. Look does matter to anyone, the truth hurts, and don’t you think so? Yes, fat is ugly, acne is ugly, black is ugly, it is just the reality that we have to accept. We are all being lied to. Everybody lies.  Being thin and slender is beautiful, having fair skin is beautiful, and if you have apart from that, you are totally ugly. I am not saying that, the world is saying that, you are saying that. Listen to the truth now. Accept the fact that you are ugly. That’s the world is showing me now. Yes, I am ugly. Because I am fat, I don’t have perfect skin, I don’t have beautiful features. I could never be loved because I am ugly. Maybe you can say, being ugly its not what you asked for, but well you have to accept that you are ugly. Yes, the perfect word for today is “U-G-L-Y”.

Aurat

Aurat itu hanya untuk suami, tapi susah giler nak berubah... nak tutup, nak tutup, tp seluar aku ketat jugak, baju aku pendek jugak, aduh.. bila nak berubah macam2 halangan yang aku cari sendiri.. bila nak tutup ni, takkan bila tuhan tarik nyawa aku, baru nak tutup dengan kain kapan kot?

Love Hurts

It hurts when you are in love, it hurts when you love the wrong person, it hurts when you love the right person. It even hurts when you are not in love and you are not loved.

It hurts me when a friend cried in her heart knowing that her husband did not love her anymore after three years of marriage. She gave up in her marriage. She gave up everything that she had sacrificed for him. It hurts me that other women out there might suffer even greater than her. It hurts me when a husband let go of his responsibilities that he had promised on the first day of marriage, that he will take care of her, the family and guide her to the right way, not letting the wife stranded in a scariest realm. It hurts me when the children are left hanging between the crossroads; to be with Daddy or stay with Mummy? It hurts me when these women cried and I wonder would I be one of them in the future? Nauzubillah, Allah knows best. And I pray my marriage would not have to go through something like that, may it lasts for a lifetime, may the love grows stronger each day and may God protect us and give us the strength to go ups and downs together and may I become a better, obedient wife towards my hubby and Him. Amin.

• As my mother once said the night before the solemnisation, "Your heaven is no longer with me, its within your husband. Obey him, love him and use nice words with him, don't leave your prayers, and pray for him and us (my parents) in your prayers". (Tears!)

For my friend;

Ya Allah, please give the best You could for her, give her sufferings that she could endure, and give her the strongest strength to go on every single day.

Friendship has gone astray.

I admit that I'm not a perfect human being, I'm not sensitive towards others too, I am inconsiderate, and I hurt my friends a lot, I brag a lot, well, I think that the reasons why some of them turn me to fiend. Nevertheless, there are friends who can accept me whatever I am, being with me in ups and downs, and Thank You Allah for giving me such companions.

• to hubby, you are the best I ever have in my life.
• to Evanna, who else in this world could I turn to if it's not you? :) thanks babe, for everything you've done for me, like waiting for me in the airport till 2 am and baking hundreds of cupcakes for my wedding, and lots more...
• to Sha and Tanty, can't imagine how could I go through school days without you guys.
• to my ex housemate, Shaikah. Although we've known for each other for a short time, but I truly appreciate you babe for being patient with me.
• to all my friends that can accept me the way I am, thank you guys.
• not forgotten Cohort 2, you guys are also the best part of my life!

What's important in marriage is to get the ingredients right

It has been ages I haven't update my blog. Well, I am now married with the man that I love. We've been in ups and downs, tears and laughter and alhamdulillah, Allah granted me with a husband that is funny, responsible and romantic, despite the fact I have to accept that he eats his cereal in a pot! A friend of mine once asked, how is it feels after getting married? Is it makes you happier because you can have sex every day? Marriage is not all about sex, it is about trust, obedience, tolerance and faithfulness. Marriage is the gift from God. It makes the sins turn to the rightful thing, it's the shield that protect you from zina (adultery) or simply makes small matter like holding hands is not sinful anymore. Marriage gives you responsibilities towards yourself and your partner. Trust me, love after marriage is much more beautiful than love before marriage. I believe that to get the right ingredients of marriage could not be done in a day, it may takes years, even forever.

Enjoy some photographs taken during my wedding day.